child life

I think I've gotten my emotions in check finally. I went to a Child Life information session on Thursday night at Cook Children's Hospital. I have been borderline obsessed with child life for about a 2 months now and visit the national website almost daily. TCU just started a graduate course track for child life, however, since I'm nearly done with my Counseling classes, my advisor and I decided it would be best for me to just stick with what I'm doing...I'm still qualified to enter Child Life as a counselor. I had been emailing with the director of child life at Cook's and she sent me the info. for the session.

Let me back up-what is child life, you ask? Well, it's hard to really sum up shortly, but while the job has traditionally been in hospitals, it is expanding to hospice centers and other similar medically-related places. A child life specialist plays with the "sick" kids, reads with them, prepares them emotionally for any procedure, provides support for the family-especially siblings, helps maintain their development, and can even go to little Billy's class and explain to them why Billy won't be at school for a while. Hello-this job sounds fabulous and so rewarding. Here's the website in case I didn't answer your question: http://www.childlife.org/.

Fast forward to Thursday. Part of the seminar was a panel discussion with 5 Cook's child life specialists. Great information, great examples and stories of what they do and how they deal with the exceptionally hard days and the days they get to go fishing as part of a group outing for the kids there. I could definitely see myself sitting on a similar panel one day. Then we get into the powerpoint discussion that explains more of the logistics of the job and shows some video clips of actual work from Cook's. I'm dying to be in those videos-I want this job! Then the explanation of the process begins...and my plan started to crumble. I don't know an easier way to explain all of this other than laying it out in steps:

To be a child life specialist (anywhere):
1-You must first complete a practicum which consists of working 3 half days shifts a week for a semester.
2-You then must apply for an internship which is full time for a semester.
3-Because applications and interviews for internship for the upcoming semester begin about two weeks after the practicum has begun, you're advised NOT to apply for internship while in practicum because you'd be competing with people who have already finished their practicum and therefore have a leg up on you since you've been at it for about 2 weeks. This means you have a semester of basically nothing (unless you're volunteering) in between.
4-Cook's is the only place in FW that has child life specialists right now. Dallas has 2.
5-On average, 30-35 people apply for the intership spots at Cooks...they accept 5-6.
6-Oh, NONE of the above is paid. Anyone have any lucky lottery numbers for me to play?? If you're counting, that's 3 semesters of no income. And if by chance you're doing all of this through TCU, it's going to be 1 1/2 years for you because TCU doesn't offer practicum/internship supervision during the summers.
7-Their advice about interships and jobs is to be flexible and willing to move. If I can take about 8 of my dearest with me, then I'll consider that. But right now, I'm really not all that much up for it...can you imagine me living in Temple, TX, which is where the next closest hospital with child life is?

I have, of course, analyzed this whole thing to death. I am still surprised at the emotional reaction I had to the disappointment-I was such a mope all day yesterday and on the verge of tears at all given moments. I woke up feeling better today, but still sad. I know a huge part of it is that I was SO excited and it feels like a giant bully just ruined something really important to me. I know, I know, everything happens for a reason. But I'm not there yet. I'm still angry and sad that something I think I'd be really good at and a job I'd love going to everyday are not nearly as in focus in my future as I thought. So, yes, I know there's a great power leading my hand, and heart, away for right now...and sure, it may be more accessible down the line. But I want it now.

I'll leave you with some more Patty Griffin:

Sometimes you wonder if you're walking in the wrong direction...